Be Kind

 

Finding Friends

 

Are You Sure It's Not Stealing?

 Last night I was reading my children a bedtime story about Brer Rabbit and Brer Fox. They both wanted some money and were trying to come up with a way to get some. Brer Fox didn't want to work for it, so he suggested taking things from other animal's houses and selling them. Brer Rabbit was shocked. "But that's stealing!" Brer Fox disagreed. So Brer Rabbit agreed to it. Brer Rabbit would do the taking and Brer Fox would do the selling. Brer Fox said it didn't matter whose house the stuff came from and he kept insisting that it wasn't stealing. So Brer Rabbit went to Brer Fox's own house and took stuff to sell. Unknowingly, Brer Fox sold his own stuff at the market! When he got home, he was horrified to find his stuff missing. Of course he cried, "I've been robbed. Someone's stolen my things!" His mean plan had backfired.

When Brer Fox was the thief, he said it wasn't stealing. But when he was the victim, it was stealing indeed!

The Bible says in Matthew 7:12 that we should treat others how we would like to be treated. 

Just like Brer Fox, when we're the one doing the treating or the 'taking', it doesn't seem so bad. But when we're the victim, it's bad indeed!

When we're the one doing the gossiping, it seems harmless. But when others gossip about us, It's very painful! When we're the one laughing, it's funny. But when we're the one laughed at, it's suddenly very serious!

 Keep this story of Brer Fox in mind and remember that stealing is stealing, whether you're the thief or the victim! Gossip is gossip. Lies are lies and so on. We need to treat others how we would like to be treated if we were in their shoes.

Comforting Others--Do We Have to Know What It's Like?

 Thoughts on 2 Corinthians 1:3-11 (part 6)

"...that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble,..." 2 Corinthians 1:4

7. We can comfort others in ANY trouble.
Have you ever felt like you can't help somebody because you don't know what it's like to go through what they're going through? It's easy to feel helpless because we don't know what to say.
In the last 5 years, I have gone through some hard times. Our fourth baby was born with Down Syndrome and heart problems. Her first year we were in hospital as much as we were home. Then two years ago, I had two miscarriages in a row. There were a lot of people who helped and encouraged us through both of these hard times. Yet in the first case, most of those people didn't know what it was like to have a baby with Down Syndrome or with heart problems. There were a few who did, and it was very nice to talk to those people and ask them questions. But the people who didn't know, were also a great help and comfort to us. 

When I had my miscarriages, I discovered that a lot of my friends had also had one at some point. It was so nice to talk to those who had been through something similar. But the people who didn't know what it was like, were just as helpful. My sisters, who don't know what it's like to even have their own child, were a comfort to me.They sent me flowers, chocolates, loving messages and encouraging songs etc.  My mum came and stayed the second time and helped me out with babysitting etc. She didn't know what it was like, but she was a huge help and comfort to me just by being there for me and doing what she could.
 I have never lost someone really close to me, so I don't know what that's like. But that doesn't mean that I can't be a help to someone who has suffered in that way. I can't say, "I know how you feel" or "I know what it's like," but I can say, "I'm so sorry, that must be awful." I can still send them loving messages or cards, give them a hug, pray for them or help in some practical way. I might feel lost as in what to say, but I can help just by being there and showing I care.
Whatever you have been through or haven't been through, you can be a comfort and a help to others who need it. 

God Comforts Us to Make Us Comforters

Thoughts on 2 Corinthians 1:3-11 (part 2)
2. God comforts us to make us comforters.
"...the God of all comfort;
Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble,..."
God doesn't comfort us just to make us comfortable, but so that we can comfort others. 
Here are two definitions of comfort that I found.
1. to lessen the sadness or sorrow of someone and to strengthen by inspiring with hope and restoring a cheerful outlook.
2. to give strength and hope to.
Are you sharing the comfort that God has given you? Are you a comforter?

A River or the Dead Sea?

The liberal soul shall be made fat: and he that watereth shall be watered also himself.  Proverbs 25:25

Are you a giver or just a taker?

Gems from Job #6

Do you ever wonder what to say to someone who is hurting or going through a difficult time? Often all someone needs is sympathy and compassion---a hug, a card, a message to say you care, a listening ear or just being there for them. You don't have to say anything! You don't have to have the answers.
In the last year we've been through an unsettling time as we've had a baby that has needed a lot of hospital care.
I remember two particular times, when I was feeling a bit nervous before meeting with the doctors, friends texted me saying they were thinking of me. I shared with them just how I was feeling. I kind of expected them to text me back telling me how I should be feeling--that I shouldn't be worrying etc. which I already knew but is easier said than done. Instead they gave me sympathy and assured me that they would find it hard too! Instead of feeling condemned I felt encouraged.
It taught me a lesson. I don't need to know the answers; I don't need to know what to say. I just need to sympathize. There is a time for giving advice etc. but often sympathy will help more.
When your friend or someone you know is grieving or hurting, remember sympathy and love go a long way towards helping them feel better!
Job's friends meant well, but were a headache to Job rather than a blessing. They had no sympathy only judgment and 'answers.'

Putting People Down

(Lessons from Martha)
"...my sister has left me to serve alone?..."
Martha put Mary down in front of Jesus in order to lift herself up. She made Mary look bad and made herself look good.
Have you ever done that?
I know I've done it many times!
When you focus on and talk about other people's faults, it makes you feel better. But...you are not perfect either!
Remember the story of the 2 men who went to the temple to pray?
The Pharisee prayed and thanked God that he wasn't like the other man, a publican. He put the publican down and brought himself up.
But the publican begged God to have mercy on him a sinner. 
 It was the publican's prayer that God listened to.

Gossiping is putting people down.

Even if you don't put people down in your words, do you criticize them in your thoughts? That's where it all starts.

The Bible is like a mirror. The more you study it, the more you see your own faults, instead of everybody elses. You'll realize that YOU are far from perfect.

The next time you are about to criticize somebody and put them down with your words, stop and think "Am I just trying to make myself look good? Am I perfect? Is what I'm going to say kind?"
When you're pulling someone down in your thoughts, stop and start counting their good qualities.

Don't put people down.

The Choices You Make TODAY...

Be Kind

And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you. Ephesians 4:32

Charity suffereth long, and is kind; 1Corinthians 13:4

The Cambridge dictionary describes the word kind as generous, helpful, and thinking about other people's feelings:

Does this describe you??
Are you kind the way you speak ...
...to your brothers and sisters
...to your friends
...about other people behind their back
...online--the comments you make on facebook?
Are you kind the way you act...
...when people are annoying you
...when friends upset you
...when you are busy
...when you are tired
...when you are having a bad day?
Are you kind the way you think...
...about your parents
...about your brothers and sisters
...about your friends
...about other people?

If you think kindly about people it will be easier to act and speak kindly. It's not always easy to think kindly about people, but there is always something positive to find in someone if you look!

Ask God to help you to be kind in the way you speak, act and think.

Are you a Blessing?

(Big Lessons from a Little Maid--2 Kings 5)
This little girl was a BIG blessing to Naaman and his family! She had enough problems of her own, yet her eyes were open to other people's problems and needs. She wasn't self-focused. And because she wasn't self-focused, she was able to be a blessing to those around her.
This week I had my Mum and two sisters come and stay for 2 days. The whole time they were here, they were looking for what they could do to help me. I went into my girls' room in the morning and the beds were made. The dishes were washed and dried and so on. But what really amazed me was the amount my Mum could do with a shoulder that she can hardly use! She can't lift much with her right arm at the moment, so I expected her to not be able to help with anything. Yet, she washed dishes, cleared the table, folded washing, hung washing on the clotheshorse etc. I was scared she would hurt her shoulder more!
She did what she could with what she had and she was a big blessing.
What about you? Are you a blessing to those around you? If you live at home, do you look for what you can do to help your family? Or do you try to get out of work? Are you a willing helper? There is always something you can do to be a blessing to someone. Even if you aren't able to do much, God can use what you can do. And if you can't do anything, you can always pray.
If you are the like the little maid and have a heart that wants to help others, you will be a big blessing to everyone you meet!

  Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others. Philippians 2:4
 

A Compassionate Heart

(Big Lessons from a Little Maid--2 Kings 5)

If someone took you away from your family and set you to work as a servant, how would you feel towards that person? When you heard that they were sick and not going to recover, would you be happy? Would you think “It's serves them right! They deserve it.”

The little maid have every reason to think like that. But instead she had compassion on her Master.

How do you feel towards people who have hurt you?

I've been a bit convicted doing this study! I am definitely lacking in this area.

Compassion means sympathy or sorrow for others suffering.

It's not so hard to feel compassion for people that we love and are close to us. But it's not always so easy to feel compassion for someone who we think deserves what they are getting!

Or even for someone we do love very much that has hurt us. We get hardened and just don't care. But that's not what we should do

But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; Matthew 5:44

How can we have compassion on someone who has hurt us or on someone that we really don't like?

By remembering that God has compassion on us! We have hurt God far more than anyone will ever hurt us. There is absolutely no reason why God should have compassion on us.

The LORD is gracious, and full of compassion; slow to anger, and of great mercy. Psalm 145:8

If you want to be like Jesus, you must be compassionate!

But when he saw the multitudes, he was moved with compassion on them, because they fainted, and were scattered abroad, as sheep having no shepherd. Matthew 9:36

The heart is the happiest....

It's the Little Things

Last week I stopped at the petrol station to get $20.00 petrol. As I was about to put my pin number in for my visa card I realized that I was about to pay $200.00! A little dot had been put in the wrong place.
I remarked to the man who had overcharged me, "A little dot makes a big difference!"
There are many little things in life that make a big difference. A little bullet, a little stone in your shoe, a little poisonous insect or spider, a little bee, a little cut in your finger etc.
There are also many little things we do or don't do that can make a big difference to our lives.
We'll start with the negative
A little lie
Gossip
A nasty or negative comment
An angry word
A little silence--the silent treatment
Talking back to someone in authority--backchatting
A little alcohol, drugs or a cigarette-- Drunkards, alcoholics, druggies and smokers all get started with a little bit.
A bad habit
A friend who is a bad influence
A bad attitude
A moment of uncontrolled anger

But then there's the positive...
A word of encouragement
A smile
A card
A gift
A phonecall
A tract--many people have gotten saved through reading a little tract.
A question--"Are you saved?" "Can I help you?" "How are you doing?"
A prayer
Lending a hand to an elderly person
A Bible verse--There are many single verses that make such a difference to my life
A little faith

Too small to make a difference?

Do you ever feel that you're too small, too insignificant or too ordinary to make a difference?
My little boy is nearly 5 months old. He can't do much yet. He's still very dependent. He can't talk, walk or help with anything. I have to do everything for him.
But, you know what? He makes a difference to our house! He has a big smile and a cute giggle. Sometimes it's impossible to be grumpy when he's around!
One afternoon when he had just started to smile, I was trying to have a rest. He woke up needing a feed. Since he was feeding very often and having very short sleeps, I was feeling tired and frustrated. I was about to grudgingly feed him when he looked up at me and voluntarily gave me a huge smile! My frustration melted instantly.
He is so small and so dependent, yet he makes our home a happier place and he brightens up our lives. He adds so much enjoyment to our day. He can't do much, but he does what he can and he makes a difference.
We are all able to do much more than a little baby. While there may be things we can't do, we can at least smile, give an encouraging word, pray or give someone a card. There are many more things that we can do.
Never think that you can't make a difference!

  

Everyone is special

Genesis 25:28 And Isaac loved Esau, because he did eat of his venison: but Rebekah loved Jacob.

James 2:9 But if ye have respect to persons, ye commit sin, and are convinced of the law as transgressors.

Romans 2:11 For there is no respect of persons with God.

Isaac loved Esau and Rebekah loved Jacob. Wouldn't it sound better---Isaac and Rebekah loved Esau and Jacob? Shouldn't parents love all their children equally?

But Isaac especially loved Esau and Rebekah especially loved Jacob. That's called 'respect of persons.'

As we study this story, we will see how this 'love problem' caused many problems. In fact, Jacob carried this trait into his family and favoured Joseph. Look where that got Joseph!

The Bible teaches us to treat people equally. That doesn't mean that we can't be closer to some people than others and get on with one person better than another.

But it does mean that we shouldn't be friendly to someone because they're pretty and be rude to someone else who's not very attractive. We shouldn't show favouritism because of someone's outward appearance.

It's easy to think, 'Oh, I wouldn't do that!' but... we do.

Are we just as friendly to people we really don't like the look of as we are to people we like?

I must admit I am not always.

Today I read a story of a primary school boy in my town who tried to commit suicide because he was sick of being taunted about his size and his skin condition. He's not the first.

I hope none of us would ever be guilty of taunting someone like that. Yet, we may be guilty in other ways---like just ignoring them or not making any effort to make them feel welcome.

Every single person is special no matter what they look like, no matter what shape or size they are or what disability they may have.

A Stumbling-block or a Stepping-stone

by Amy Carmichael
 
"To each is given a bag of tools,
An hour-glass, and a book of rules;
And each must build ere his work be done,
A stumbling-block or a stepping-stone."


Our bag of tools--our body with all its various powers, the "tools" God has given us to use; the hour-glass--time; the book of rules--our Bible; the stumbling-block--that which will hinder others; the stepping-stone--that which will help them nearer Heaven--so far all is clear.
Is this clear too? We cannot build both a stumbling-block and a stepping-stone. We must choose which we will build. Once built it stands; we cannot pull it down and begin over again. Is not this an awful truth? Think of what it would be if, when the day is over and the work is done, we looked at it and saw a stumbling-cbock. God save us from that.
Every true, loving, faithful thought, word, or deed, helps to build the stepping-stone. Every untrue, unloving, unfaithful thought, word, or deed, helps to build the stumbling-block over which others will fall.
God help us all to build stepping-stones.
 

Rebekah's Kindness

And the servant ran to meet her, and said, Let me, I pray thee, drink a little water of thy pitcher. And she said, Drink, my lord: and she hasted, and let down her pitcher upon her hand, and gave him drink. And when she had done giving him drink, she said, I will draw water for thy camels also, until they have done drinking. And she hasted, and emptied her pitcher into the trough, and ran again unto the well to draw water, and drew for all his camels. And the man wondering at her held his peace, to wit whether the LORD had made his journey prosperous or not.

Genesis 24:17-21

Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others. Philippians 2:4

Rebekah was kind. She didn't only look out for herself. She saw someone else's need and tried to fill it.

The other day I did grocery shopping with Hannah(2yrs) and Esther(6 months). I went to two shops. Pak N Save was the second shop. Both girls were fine up until I got to the counter at Pak N Save. By then Esther had had enough. To stop her crying I got her out of the trolley and held her. But I still had a whole trolley to unpack. Have you ever tried holding a heavy baby on one hand and lifting a big box of nappies out of a trolley with the other hand? Now, that's a challenge! Thankfully, there was a kind man behind me who stepped forward and emptied out my whole trolley. He wasn't only looking out for himself. He saw my need and did what he could do to help, even though he didn't know me and it was really no concern of his.

A little kindness can make a big difference to someone's day.

The Bible says that Rebekah was a beautiful girl, but we can see from her actions that her beauty wasn't skin deep. A kind unselfish character is what really makes a girl beautiful.

How can you show kindness to someone today?

A Good Name

“Now there was at Joppa a certain disciple named Tabitha, which by interpretation is called Dorcas: this woman was full of good works and almsdeeds which she did.

 And it came to pass in those days, that she was sick, and died: whom when they had washed, they laid her in an upper chamber.

And forasmuch as Lydda was nigh to Joppa, and the disciples had heard that Peter was there, they sent unto him two men, desiring him that he would not delay to come to them.

Today Is Ours

Today is ours--with chance to smile

And make the day a day worth while,

To speak kind words of hope and cheer

To those cast down with care and fear;

To check the frowns that only mar

And leave upon our brow their scar.

Our trivial ills will come to nought
If other's sorrows claim our thought.
Today is ours to boldly dare

To meet our justice and be fair

In all our dealings--all we say.

Now is our hour, now our day.

Only today we call our own;

Today is ours, and today alone.

         --Laura Harney Rathbone